Wedding Invitation Etiquette Questions Answered
Your wedding invitation is one of the most important elements of your wedding. You must know the invitation etiquette on when, how, and all other points to consider when creating your invites.
Here are some answers to your most pressing wedding-invite-related questions.
When should we send out our wedding invitations?
Traditionally, invitations go out six to eight weeks before the wedding. This gives guests plenty of time to clear their schedules and make travel arrangements if they don’t live in town. If it’s an out of the country wedding, send them out three months ahead of time. Most couples also send out save-the-date cards. They go out at six to eight months.
When should we make the deadline for RSVPs?
Make your RSVP date two to three weeks before your wedding date to allow enough time for you to get a final head count to the caterer (one week before) and to finalize your seating chart. If some guests still haven’t responded by your deadline, give them a quick call and ask for their RSVPs (still via mail) so you have all their information.
Can we include our registry info on our invitations or save-the-dates?
In a word, no. Including registry info on the wedding invitations or save-the-dates is still considered impolite because it can come off as though you’re asking for gifts. Tell your wedding party, parents and close friends where you are registered, and let them fill guests in.
We’re having an adults-only wedding (no kids). How can we make sure this is clear to our guests?
Address your invitations correctly—to each guest by name, not “and guest”—and guests should understand that the invite is meant for only those mentioned. If you find that some reply with their children’s names added, give them a call and explain you’re having an adults-only wedding and you hope they can still attend.
How do we let guests know our dress code?
The easiest way to get your point across is to include a dress code in the lower right-hand corner of the invite or on a reception card. “Black tie,” “cocktail attire” or “casual attire” are all acceptable. Your invitation design will also clue guests in.
Do we have to invite every guest with a date or a “plus-one”?
No, you don’t have to. If a guest isn’t married or in a serious relationship, it’s perfectly acceptable to invite them solo. Most guests will understand that without “and Guest” or another name on the invitation means they aren’t invited with a plus-one. While it’s always nice to invite everyone with a guest, if you’re having a small wedding, your family and friends should understand your reasoning.
What should you do if a guest RSVPs for two?
Call them up and explain you’re having an intimate wedding and, unfortunately, you were not able to invite everyone with a guest. If you realize that nearly everyone will be coupled up, extend a plus-one invitation to your few single friends and family.
Where do you put the return address on wedding invitations?
The return address usually goes on the back flap of the envelope. Also, the return address used should be that of the person(s) whom you’ve designated to receive response cards, be it your parents or you (traditionally, whoever is hosting the wedding handles response cards). Don’t forget that the RSVP envelope should also be printed with this address (and should include postage).
If our wedding reception is for immediate family only, is it okay to invite people to the ceremony only?
No, it’s impolite. Everyone who attends the ceremony (or bridal shower, engagement party or wedding reception) should be invited to the wedding—that means the ceremony and the reception. In your case, by inviting guests to one and not the other, you’re basically saying you want them there for the actual ceremony but you either don’t want to pay for their plate at your party or don’t care enough to have them there to actually celebrate with you.
Now you know some common questions on wedding invitation etiquette. Do you have a question that’s not here? You may ask us.
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